


Life Works Like That

by alonesearcher



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Boys Kissing, Freeform, M/M, On Hiatus, Pesterlog, Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-04
Updated: 2013-06-27
Packaged: 2017-12-07 11:52:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/748216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alonesearcher/pseuds/alonesearcher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave likes John<br/>(HIATUS)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

John knew Dave was thinking too hard because he was uncharacteristically quiet. When Strider wasn’t filling the silence with monologues littered with creative metaphors he was minimally composing raps of varying quality under his breath. In fact he was pretty certain Dave wasn’t even aware he was acting out of character. John did what any reasonable best friend would do, given the situation.  
  
Dave was deftly dodging between students in the halls, his mind elsewhere. He was vaguely aware of his friend’s presence beside him, and he counted on John to know where they were going, since he wasn’t concentrating on navigating to their shared science period.  
  
John, being the good pal that he was, calculated the best way to take advantage of his absent mindedness. It wasn’t often that Dave let his guard down enough that John thought he could pull one over on him. After all, Dave was virtually a ninja in his own right.  
  
He made a few quick calculations, hoping Dave was too wrapped up in his thoughts to notice the change in atmosphere, or feel the tension in John’s body as he prepared to attack. He shifted his momentum suddenly, moving as if to slam into Dave. Dave was jarred into cognizance as he quickly moved to avoid John’s body, only to have to whirl out of the way of a gaggle of girls who were all four holding hands. He stepped further aside, annoyed as he had to duck under a short boy holding a large popsicle stick art project and slam himself into the lockers as a math teacher cast him an irritated stare. Dave glared at John, who was wearing a grin of victory. Dave’s eyes narrowed behind his shades as he waited for the ebb in the tide of students so he could dart back over to the proper flow of traffic, where John waited off to the side, pressing his body against the walls so he wouldn’t get pulled along.  
  
“I’m sure that short person would have appreciated you breaking his castle of sticks, you know with my body,” Dave fell back into rhythm beside John, feeling a twinge of anger for allowing himself to be caught unprepared.  
  
John shrugged. “I figured you would manage to dodge him, but I thought I’d get you tangled up with Mr. Briggs.”  
  
“Oh thanks,” Dave said, plotting revenge. “I would have received four weeks of detention so you could laugh your ass off at your supposed best friend manhandling a teacher. And Jegus fuck you know Mr. Briggs would probably decide to body slam me with his massive bulk. His fleshy form suffocating, crushing me into a Strider pancake, which is a handsome breakfast food, but has zero nutritional value.”  
  
John shifted his backpack on his shoulder. “You have no one to blame but yourself. I just lost my balance, and you stumbled into our peers.”  
  
Dave scoffed. “Lost your balance my ass. You waited until I wouldn’t have an opening to move anywhere but towards the fragile art project of used dessert pieces. I didn’t even dodge that because I was worried he’d cry, but so his corn syrup and slobber residue would not touch me.”  
  
“You could have just let me hit you.”  
  
“It was automatic,” Dave fisted his hands in his pockets. “If your brother threw things at you for training you’d learn to dodge subconsciously too.”  
  
They shuffled into the classroom with everyone else. Dave plopped his book bag at the free desk by the window, feeling he deserved it more than John. He gave him an annoyed look so John knew he was mad they didn’t get to sit in the back because he made them late.  
  
John was too busy reveling in his successful prank to pay his friend’s scorching gaze much mind.  
  
The teacher was an hour long into a monologue on cell membranes when Dave’s cell vibrated. He looked over his shoulder at Terezi, who was leaning low in her seat and grinning in his direction. He looked at the message under his desk. The teacher most likely would have noticed if he looked up, but Mr. X didn’t really care that much if his students were on their cells.  
  
\--gallowsCalibrator [GC]\-- began pestering --turntechGodhead [TG]\--  
  
GC: H3Y COOL K1D >:]  
  
TG: sup  
  
GC: D1D YOU T3LL H1M Y3T  
  
TG: tell who what  
  
GC: YOU KNOW  
  
GС: D1D YOU T3LL JOHN YOU W4NT TO H4V3 H1S B4B13S  
  
TG: nope  
  
GC: TH4T’S PR3TTY L4M3 D4V3 ]:  
  
TG: i dont recall asking for you to stick your extra long nose into it pyrope  
  
TG: besides babies will have to wait until i discern whether my best friend would be interested in strider beef and man macking before we start talking kids  
  
TG: one step at a time  
  
GC: 1 KN3W YOU’D PUNK OUT ON M3  
  
GC: DO 1 H4V3 TO ST3P 1N 4ND F1X TH1S D4V3  
  
TG: i dont foresee any good coming of you stepping in and doing anything  
  
TG: how about you concentrate on your own romantic tryst instead and ill focus on my private man crushes all on my lonesome  
  
GC: TH3 CRUSH P4RT 1SNT FUN 4NYMOR3 1 W4NT MOOOOR3  
  
TG: i need to turn you on to some soap operas so youll stop getting your jollies from my dismal personal drama as it were  
  
TG: really dont you have other people to scheme against  
  
GC: >:D  
  
TG: oh god just leave it alone  
  
TG: if i thought for a second he was interested id be on it but so far he doesnt seem to be even aware of the concept of dating  
  
TG: you should concentrate on passing your classes  
  
GC: 1 W1LL P4SS TH3M 1F NOT 1N TH3 TR4D1T1ON4L S3NS3…  
  
TG: its true that blackmail is usually considered nontraditional  
  
GC: >;]  
  
\--gallowsCalibrator [GC]\-- ceased pestering --turntechGodhead [TG]\--

The bell released them from the lecture, and Dave was the first to the door, despite being one of the furthest from it. John was pretty quick himself, seeing as lunch was the next period. John waited for Dave to launch into a tirade about the monotony of the class or his continued annoyance at John’s earlier escapades, but Dave instead had his hands shoved into his pockets and was staring straight ahead, lost inside his own head again.  
  
“I’m just going to talk about how great National Treasure is until you pay attention to me,” John huffed, glaring behind him as his fellow students bumped his shoulder roughly and kept moving.  
  
“Why are you torturing me? I certainly haven’t done anything worthy of the amount of effort you’re putting into aggravating me today,” Dave forced himself to focus on John and stop thinking about John.  
  
“What’s on your mind man?”  
  
Dave smirked. “Nothing.”  
  
“You’ve been spacing all day,” John turned his body to avoid another student. The hallways were always more packed closer to the cafeteria.  
  
“I have a more heightened awareness than anyone,” Dave dodged everyone around him without making it look like he was moving at all. “And how about what has been on your mind all day that you are so in need of me filling the silence with my usual glorious words?”

John flinched guiltily, not nearly as good at hiding his thoughts or redirecting conversation. “Um… nothing.”  
  
Dave raised an eyebrow at him. “Sounds like you’re trying to bullshit me.”  
  
John stepped out of the line headed for food. “I forgot to get a book from my locker. Meet you at the table.”  
  
Well that wasn’t suspicious. As a good friend Dave had no other course of action but to investigate this unusual behavior. 

He caught up to John outside his locker, which was in the art wing of the school. Most of the classrooms were in session for the students who had the later lunch period, like Rose and Jade. John had regained his composure, stuffing suspicious gadgets, textbooks, and notes from his father back into his locker. _You made it to page 246 if your math textbook, you now understand pre-algebra, I am so proud of you son, you are now a man._  
  
John waved the math textbook sheepishly. “You didn’t have to walk me to my locker, see, I got it.”  
  
Dave shrugged. “I wasn’t hungry anyway. So is something up with you?”  
  
“Nope,” John shoved the book in his bag, crushing notebook paper at the bottom in his haste. “Let’s try to get back before they’re out of fries.”  
  
“That ship as probably sailed.”  
  
John sighed. “I’m sorry I’ve just, well Terezi was saying some weird things to me earlier and I can’t get them out of my head.” He tugged on his shirt. “Usually I could count on you distracting me but you seem to have your own issues today.”  
  
Dave felt a pit in his stomach. She’d talked to John already, before she had even had that conversation with Dave in class?  
  
A group of students came into the hall so he pulled John into an empty classroom. “Out of curiosity what exactly did the lady Pyrope say to you and about what, and also she’s a dirty liar, probably.”  
  
John’s eyebrows shot up. “Apparently you have an idea of what she said.”  
  
Dave crossed his arms, the pit in his stomach hardening into a lead ball of dread. “She could have revealed any number of personal secrets I naively revealed and she in turn passes around frivolously like fruit cakes during the holidays.”  
  
“You know I never said she mentioned something about you,” John shifted his feet and set his jaw, walking to glance at the window and stare at the students running to get some food before lunch ended. “She said you were keeping a secret from me, about being in love. It seems like it’s true.”  
  
“Oh,” he said, watching John closely. “I guess that’s kind of true.”  
  
John was paying close attention too, but he couldn’t bring himself to turn around. “You never told me you even liked anyone.”  
  
The word _fuck_ played like a broken record in the forefront of Dave’s mind. “I don’t know if they like me back.” _Stupid fucking fuck._  
  
The tension was weird and palpable. John didn’t want to play games anymore, he had to know. “Dave who is it?”  
  
“You,” it slipped from Dave’s lips without his consent.  
  
John’s shoulder’s tightened. “That’s not funny Dave.” His blood was rushing loudly in his ears. “Why would you tell Terezi you have a crush on me?”  
  
“Because I love you,” Dave turned John around so John was staring into his own reflection in Dave’s sunglasses.  
  
John froze, electricity bolting up his spine. He jerked back. “No you don’t Dave.”  
  
“Excuse me? Did I miss the memo that told me you were the new foremost authority on my feelings you jackass?” Dave let John slip away from him, letting his hands fall to his sides. “Tell me you think I’m gross or you don’t like me back, but don’t tell me what I feel asshole.”  
  
John’s eyes flashed angry for a moment. “You’re Dave Strider!”  
  
“Motherfucking Strider,” he corrected.  
  
“Yes! Exactly! Dave Motherfucking Strider!” John pulled back further. “And I’m John, just John.”  
  
Dave frowned harder. “You’re not just John. I don’t understand what you’re getting at.” This was not going the way he expected.  
  
“For fuck’s sake, you’re going to get bored of me!” John kept his hands fisted at his side, trying not to make angry gestures at Dave. He felt cold down to his bones, but he refused to back down from this. The words poured from his mouth so readily now, hurrying as if he just wanted to push everything out of him, let Dave know every thought he’d had swirling around in his brain. As if saying it all would empty his mind of it forever. “Dave I don’t even think you know what you want! How do you know if you want to date a guy, let alone me? How many girls have you dated? How many guys? I’m going to bet not a lot. So that leaves me with being in a relationship almost destined for failure. Who stays with their high school boyfriend or girlfriend? Besides we’ve been friends forever, why now? And if it doesn’t work then what happens to our friendship? What about Rose and Jade? How will they feel about it?” John took a breath, trying to think if he was leaving anything out. “And also having me for a boyfriend sounds like it would be more boring for you than for me. That leaves me being the one feeling unsure about everything. Like you said, you’re Dave Motherfucking Strider.”  
  
After saying all that he felt drained, and completely exhausted. He almost didn’t know what to do now. No matter what Dave had to say, now he just wanted a nap.  
  
Dave felt his muscles relax, tension leaving his body as he sighed. “That’s it? Aw man John, just fuck that shit. I can’t believe you’ve been thinking about this.”  
  
“That’s it?” John stared at him disbelieving. “Oh yeah, that monologue of troubling problems. Yeah, that’s it.”  
  
“I can’t believe you think you’re boring. You’re the guy who switched the girl’s and boy’s bathroom signs on the third floor. And didn’t you replace the teacher’s chalk with candy?”  
  
John snorted. “She didn’t even notice until halfway through the lecture.”  
  
Dave smirked, almost laughing with relief. Almost. “John in all that nonsense you didn’t say whether you want to actually date me.”  
  
John threw him a rude look. “How about fuck you.”  
  
“I was hoping we could start slower but Jegus John,” Dave was in front of him in the next second. “I guess you’re just after me for my body after all.”  
  
John made a noble attempt to re-swallow his heart. “There’s not much else there besides the body.”  
  
“Forget the rest of that shit,” Dave leaned in closer. “Do you want to date me?”  
  
“No,” John said, trying to inch around Dave and leave. “You didn’t hear a word I said.”  
  
“I heard you being a pussy. I love you and you at least want to try dating me,” Dave cocked his head, waiting to see if John would deny it. When John just stared at him he continued. “I thought so. Let’s just do it. The rest of the stuff will work itself out.”  
  
John felt his resolve weakening. He shook his head. “It’s a bad idea.”  
  
Dave kissed him. John shuddered as the taller boy pressed their lips together. His body heated under Dave’s hands. He was torn between the need to breath and the fear that if he moved at all that Dave wouldn’t keep kissing him. John bunched his fingers in Dave’s jacket. After what seemed like too short of time Dave pulled back. “Is it still a bad idea?”  
  
John felt like he’d drank ten cups of coffee. His whole body was acting strange. “Dave I don’t…”  
  
“Too late, I just updated my relationship status on like five different social networks,” Dave leaned in for another kiss, pressing his lips firmly to John’s lips. He pulled back, fingers flying across his iPhone. “I’ll drive you home after school. Meet you by the track.”  
  
He walked to the door as John struggled to find words. “You don’t have a car.” Was the best he could come up with.  
  
Dave laughed as he closed the door behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

John looked disparagingly at his Facebook and Twitter pages. Did Dave realize that he’d told John’s family and friends he was essentially gay? What was he supposed to say to his Nanna’s shocked response to his changed status? Still it wasn’t like John was in a hurry to deny it either. He tapped his fingers against his desk. He had a half-finished code in one window and a book report under that, the other page was full of shocked responses to the changed status on both his and Dave’s accounts. There wasn’t anyone that was upset, mostly stunned and insulted. It was out of nowhere for both of them, since no one even suspected that they could be gay. The highest grossing comment though was of people offended that they’d heard it online and not from John or Dave themselves.  


Speaking of which, he was now fielding two chats from Rose and Jade. They were both upset to have spotted the update online. John was more than happy to blame it all on Dave, because it was his fault. John would have been content to wait and see how things went, but now he was staring at a computer full of comments and questions he didn’t know how to respond to.  
He sighed, fingers hovering over the keyboard as he thought through his reply. Rose didn’t wait for him to think though, her comments popping up faster than he could read them.  


\--tentacleTherapist [TT]\-- began pestering -- ectoBiologist [EB]\--  


TT: Tell me the truth John. Have you torn my own brother from betwixt my sheltering bosom? Stole my susceptible fledgling sibling from the safety and tender shelter of his doting family into the murky and furtive realm of dating?  


EG: what? no. i mean… i don’t know. maybe. the point is, this is all dave’s fault  


TT: It is precisely as I feared. You have pilfered my brother’s innocence. Carted his heart away from the unassuming delight of day to day existence and enticed him with promises of sweet late night embraces.  


EG: honestly rose how could i resist? dave is so naïve and gullible i couldn’t control myself  


TT: Hmm, a compelling argument to say the least. Nonetheless I can’t help but ponder why I have not heard anything of this from either of you in the entirety of our friendship, which need I remind you span many years and countless conversations. I can’t help but wonder if this was one of your wily pranks that you roped Dave into.   


EG: i can’t blame you for asking. to be honest i’m not one hundred percent sure what i feel or even what is going on. it all went down pretty fucking quick  


TT: Hmm, very interesting.  


EG: …hmm? that’s it. rose surely if anyone can tell me if i’m gay it would be you  


TT: I hate to be the one to notify you of this common knowledge, but I cannot tell you if you are gay. Only you would be able to discern that. Besides I’m not certain I’m comfortable conferring on my brother’s abrupt dating life with his unexpected boyfriend.  


EG: … really? you?  


TT: No, not really. I am more than comfortable discussing most topics. Why did you agree to date Dave if you are still unconvinced of your frame of mind? You could scarcely say that you have given courting girls much of a chance, so you do not have much comparison.  


EG: it’s complicated i guess. suddenly without my knowing i started thinking that way about him, a lot. i can’t really say what dave is thinking. i felt weird when terezi said he liked someone, and then when i asked him about it he admitted it was me. things spiraled into him being my boyfriend by the end of the conversation  


TT: I assume spreading the news on Twitter and Facebook was his idea. I can follow his thought process on that.   


EG: that doesn’t comfort me. at the very least you know to blame him for that. on an unrelated note do you own a car at this point in time?  


TT: And relinquish the joys of public transportation? Unfortunately my fiscal state does not support such a luxury at this point in time.   


EG: i thought as much. never mind about that. i don’t know how to sort this mess out. i need damage control advice  


TT: Interesting.  


EG: arg, the only time i need you to monologue and tell me things about myself i didn’t want to know  


TT: Haha, well the single guidance I’ll offer you at this point is that you ought to take it slow and attempt to sense one another’s feelings before going too far. I caution you both to be confident this is what you desire before turning this into something your friendship will not recover from. Meditate on what you are jeopardizing. That being said you both have a duty to try to gain some experience out of this, bearing in mind how diminutive your familiarity is.  


EG: that was just one piece of advice? and what do you mean experience?!  


TT: For example, take Dave close in your arms and gently remove his shades. Gaze into his eyes intensely, no, passionately.  


EG: oh jegus. rose that’s your brother! this is not helpful  


TT: Lean in close, so you can feel his breath.  


EG: oh please make it stop  


TT: Finally touch your lips to his.  


\-- ectoBiologist [EB]\-- ceased pestering -- tentacleTherapist [TT]\--  


TT: Hahahahaha.  


If anything was not helpful to anyone, anywhere, at any time, it was that conversation just now. He was going to need a shower or something. No one he knew but Rose would speak of their brother in that context. John clicked over to Jade’s window, hoping for a more constructive conversation.  


\--gardenGnostic [GG]\-- began pestering -- ectoBiologist [EB]\--  


GG: JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHN!!!! D:  


GG: dont ignore me john!!!  


GG: i assume youre talking to rose  


GG: you better explain things to me john!!! :(  


EG: sorry jade, i was talking to rose.  
GG: !!!!!  


EG: i know, hold on. I guess there is a lot to explain. the thing is dave said he liked me and i think i might like him, maybe, so we decided to try dating. well, he decided. huh, i guess there isn’t a lot to explain. the important thing we should take away from this, is how much of this is really all dave’s fault.  


GG: oh my gosh, that’s so out of nowhere!  


EG: i know! god damn strider leaving all the explaining to me. where the fuck is he? I don’t know what is going on…  


GG: so this is for real??? :O  


EG: yeah? maybe? i think…  


GG: im so surprised!!! i never would have guessed. i mean, both of you like each other! what does that mean for our friends though??? :O  


EG: um… nothing i guess? i mean, we’re still all friends. even if dave and i broke up or something we would still all be friends.  


GG: are you positive???  


EG: yeah, i think so.  


GG: i usually see these things coming. Most of the time i fell like i know things before you guys, now i feel left out :(  


EG: really jade, i had no idea he felt that way until terezi said something suspicious to me. even after that i didn’t know until he told me this afternoon. it’s all really fast.  


GG: yeah :(  


EG: i don’t know what to say.  


GG: you know, even though its surprising rose and i still love you <3  


EG: haha, that’s good i guess? i probably wasn’t worried about it.  


GG: thats because we are the type of friends that dont make you worry about us stopping loving you because suddenly you want to make out with each other ;)  


EG: aw man, you and rose are having way too much fun with this.  


GG: maybe, but why did i find out you were dating online!? >:(  


EG: once again we come back around to dave being a jerk and leaving me to take the heat. by the way, do you have a car?  


GG: no, im still trying to save up and help grandpa buy the house. why???  


EG: never mind… hey hold on dave is pestering me.  


GG: oh good, now i can scold him too!!!   


\-- ectoBiologist [EB]\-- ceased pestering -- gardenGnostic [GG]\--  


Jade always made John feel calmer about everything. Maybe it was because she got so worked up? He leaned back in his chair as he stared at Dave’s chumhandle on his screen. His stomach felt tight, but he closed everything else on his computer screen and read over what Dave was saying.  


\--turntechGodhead [TG]\-- began pestering --ectoBiologist [EB]\--  


TG: john you have no idea how much everyone is up in my business right now  


TG: its like jegus fuck  


TG: get your nose out of my business assholes  


TG: and theyre all like  


TG: no way dave i need to get my long ass nose all up in this business right here cause this is some good business  


TG: so far up in your business that there is no way i could possibly smell anything else because my nose is too busy being embedded in your good smelling stuff  


TG: god damn people give me five seconds without my phone vibrating or im going to put it in a blender  


EG: was this just a bunch of upset girls?  


TG: thats some un-relevant shit your spouting  


EG: im gonna send you my nana’s email address so you can explain to her why my facebook says you’re my boyfriend. also are you hiding from jade and rose?  


TG: that would be decidedly uncool of me  


TG: not to change the subject away from outing you to your nana but holy shit im done with this lets hang out and hide from society together  


EB: if only everyone who’ve ever known us hadn’t all found out at once something shocking like that.  


TG: your sarcasm is not helpful  


TG: lets go somewhere dark where social media cannot penetrate every moment  


TG: dude lets go see a movie  


TG: hide out in the safe darkness like fucking ninjas from all our annoying well-meaning friends and family until some celebrity has a baby and they forget about us  


EG: like a date? how does that even work?  


TG: like when we normally go to the movies pretty much  


TG: fuck if i know  


TG: lets forget everything for now and just eat high sodium popcorn and syrupy coke  


EB: it’s funny that you now wish to run away from the problem you pretty much caused  


EG: but ok  


EG: only because i don’t know what to tell anyone anymore  


EG: and there is a movie i really want to see  


TG: fucking awesome  


TG: ill pick you up  


EB: seriously did you steal a car? that seems like something that should be disclosed to me…  


EB: dave?  


\--turntechGodhead [TG]\-- ceased pestering --ectoBiologist [EB]\--


	3. Chapter 3

Dave’s car wasn’t new by any means. The worn red paint and dust coated windows encased a beat up body. The engine was shaky at best. John feared for his life. The inside smelled bad, as if the car’s previous owner had been an avid smoker. John knew Dave didn’t smoke, and he also knew that Dave did not smell like smoke, meaning he didn’t have the car long.  


“Are you going to give me the silent treatment like an asshole all night?” Dave inquired, turning sharply onto the side street.  


“Maybe I’m too terrified of your driving to speak,” John shot back, breaking a fifteen minute silent streak. “Are you even going the right way?”  


“Probably,” Dave smirked. “And my driving is so amazing my driving instructor wanted me to teach him. He was so impressed he recommended I drive professionally, but I was like nah man that’s cool. He was so depressed he retired, said there would never be another person who could drive as well as I can. It’s like me and the car are one unit John, one-fucking-unit.”  


As he said this he sped through a yellow light and zipped through traffic. John tightened his seatbelt. “Well I think you’re going to get us arrested. The only reason I’ll be arrested too is because as soon as the car stops I plan to throttle you, assuming I survive the fiery car crash we are en-route for.”  


Dave swung into the mall parking lot as if he was fleeing from enemies. The seatbelt strained to keep John from going through the windshield as Dave confidently parked in a tight parking space. John fled the car for the safety of the sidewalk. Dropping to his knees dramatically he hugged the wall. “Thank you Jegus!”  


“Cute,” Dave pulled John to his feet in a swift movement, waving nonchalantly at curious passersby. “Could we get our tickets or should I start charging people to watch you make a scene? Cause I need to be making some money off of this if it is going to be a thing.”  


John shrugged. “Okay let’s see what is playing.”  


John followed Dave through the crowd to the movie theatre, just like he’d done a hundred times in the past. Now he felt unsure and awkward. Even though their banter came naturally it didn’t feel the same to John, and he suspected it felt different to Dave too. What were they doing this for? Was he supposed to hold his hand or something? He didn’t know. He did know that when Dave touched his skin it was like he was being electrocuted now.  


Dave came to a stop in front of the movie listing, standing beside a couple to read the titles. John looked disparagingly at the list. “The next showing isn’t for an hour.”  


Dave did a quick scan of the list to locate the movie John wanted to watch. He groaned as if in pain. “What the fuck John? Why do you always pick the most crap vomit of cinema to poison me with? You’re going to kill my brain cells. I’ll fail all my classes and get kicked out of University. Is that what you want John? After how hard it was to get my mom’s tax information out of her so I could apply for financial aid.”  


John walked away from the couple so they would stop staring at Dave. “No way Dave, you’ll see this movie is going to kick ass.”  


“You’re full of shit John,” Dave glanced around the area. “Let’s get the tickets and get a soda while we wait.”  


“Hold on, there is a store I want to look at.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Dave took a long sip of his soda as John happily browsed the joke shop. John ignored his best friend/boyfriend’s indignant moan of despair. 

This was the best place in the world, and he didn’t know why Dave didn’t agree. Dave glanced woefully at a cart full of whoopee cushions. “Come on man, there is a place selling bladed weapons across the hall and you want to drool over fucking smoke bombs and rubber chickens? You need to man up and look at murder weapons with me John. John… John quit ignoring me and let’s go look at manly things.”  


“Five more minutes,” John lied, plotting how best to surprise his sister when Jade next visited. Nothing that popped out of boxes though, he didn’t need her discharging firearms in his apartment again.  


“You said as much fifteen minutes ago,” Dave looked around bored, annoyed with himself. This was a normal day, and not the date type of situation he was hoping for. Still, he was making this up as he went. Twenty four hours earlier he’d had zero intention of acting on his feelings. If Terezi hadn’t blindsided him he wouldn’t have even suspected 

John could have any sort of feelings in return. Sure he’d jumped on it, but if he hadn’t John would have flipped out and taken it all back. He might feel a little guilty about forcing him into it with social media though.  


Then again if this possibly worked out the knot in his stomach might be worth it. Still assassinate Terezi was high on his list.  


John finished checking out and joined Dave by the door, showing off a bag of what he considered to be some pretty sweet loot. Dave eyed it suspiciously. “I’m exempt from that stuff right?”  


“Why would you be?” John said straight faced. “If anything you deserve a little itching powder.”  


They made their way back to the theatre. The crowd was thick with the evening rush of after school kids and late night mall crawlers. Dave had to raise his voice to be heard. “I will know it was you, and I will hurt you Egbert.”  


John rolled his eyes. Dave figured he was obviously terrified and wouldn’t dare. 

They hid towards the back of the theatre as the movie previews rolled. Dave placed his soda on the arm rest between them so he could throw the popcorn he’d got in his mouth. He’d decided he didn’t want to push things too fast and scare John off, so he wouldn’t try anything. The popcorn didn’t taste as good as he’d thought it would. The previews were boring, and he was pretty sure this latest Nicholas Cage flick would be a disaster. John looked pretty keyed up though.  


He offered John the popcorn as the beginning of the movie began. John took a handful without looking, his eyes on the screen. Dave leaned back with a groan. “I’m just going to take a nap for about an hour, wake me if the theatre lights on fire or something.”  


John glanced at the blonde haired man sitting next to him. “I don’t think you grasp the brilliance of this actor. He is really good at what he does. Plus I’ve been looking forward to this sequel forever.”  


“I’m sorry John, I couldn’t hear you over his bad acting,” Dave set the popcorn on the floor between his feet. “My brain is going to leak out my ears. Why do I ever let you pick the movie?” A few movie patrons glanced behind them and Dave lowered his voice. “Actually next time I want to see a good movie I’ll let you pick, and then we’ll go to the opposite one you chose. That way we can guarantee a good flick.”  


“Sorry, I can’t hear you over Cage’s awesome acting.”

Dave looked at the bottom of his soda sadly. He had torn the edges of the plastic lid to the point it would no longer grasp the lip of the cup. He was so bored. The movie wasn’t as bad as he expected, but he couldn’t focus on what was happening on screen. There were so many unnecessary explosions.  


No one in the theatre seemed to be paying much attention either. It wasn’t awkward or jarring at all to be surrounded by couples making out- with his boyfriend being the only one actually watching the movie of course. Was that ironic?  


John seemed enraptured with the film, unaware that he was the sole devoted attendee. All Dave could do was wonder how John would react if he moved to hold his hand. This whole thing consumed his thoughts. He was definitely going to fail his classes. Was he really here, on a date with John? How the hell had this happened? He’d liked John for some time, but John had never seemed interested in him or anyone really. Since he’d never planned to actually date him in reality, he didn’t know how to go about it. His private fantasies, such as they were, had involved them deep in a relationship, not on the precipice of one.  


The movie was in its third act when John noticed Dave was bored out of his mind. His popcorn container and soda were abused and in a pile on the floor. He’d taken to tearing the threads out of the jeans he was wearing. Dave was very patient with him. Going to a movie he knew he wouldn’t like to indulge John, despite his complaints, was generous of him.  


He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but he had thought Dave would do something different, since this was a date… wasn’t it? Was he losing interest, or did Striders not make a move on the first date? Well Dave had already kissed him that afternoon, but would he do it again? Did John want him to? Maybe it was John’s turn to make a move. The idea made him feel flustered.  


Heart in his throat John’s hand shot out to grasp Dave’s. He kept his eyes glued to the screen as Dave froze beside him. His breathing was shallow as Dave’s hand warmed under his touch. John wouldn’t know Dave was still there if it weren’t for his hand under John’s, since the man hadn’t so much as taken a breath of air. After a few moments of having his hand on top of Dave’s hand, Dave turned his wrists so his hand was palm up, folding his fingers over top of John’s so they were properly holding hands.  


John held Dave’s hand through the rest of the movie. Dave didn’t want to move or shift his body for fear John would pull his hand away. He hadn’t expected John to do anything like that. He found himself wishing the movie that had previously been sucking out his soul would last longer. Too soon the movie was over. As the credits rolled the couple ahead of them stood, and John got up, reclaiming his hand. Dave scooped up his trash in the next heartbeat. “That movie fucking sucked.”  


John smirked. “Well, maybe it wasn’t as good as the first one.”

Dave wanted to prolong the night. He had never felt this strange anxiety when John would go home before. Was it because he was afraid John would have too much time to himself to think, and change his mind.  


He decided that was categorically uncool of him.  


John was staring out the window thoughtfully. The thought of going home put a bad taste in Dave’s mouth, but he could sense that John was tired. “Well get the fuck out of my car you freeloading bastard.”  


John glanced over. “You seem to have forgotten who paid for the tickets.”  


“So you’re just going to plant your ass in my vehicle as long as you please?”  


“I’m not convinced this is your vehicle,” John shot back. He turned towards Dave. “What now?”  


Dave sighed. “Now you go to sleep, and we go to school tomorrow.”  


John nodded. “And we keep dating?”  


“I would like to, yes,” Dave couldn’t bring himself to look at John. His hands tightened on the steering wheel. “Are you toying with me?”  


“Probably not,” John unbuckled his seat belt and opened the car door, the cool night wind invading the warmth of the automobile. His apartment was two stories up, but he could see the soft light of his computer. He’d left it on. “Well, goodnight, I guess.”  


“Wait,” Dave grabbed John’s wrists. John jerked around surprised as Dave immediately let go. “Tomorrow, let’s hang out. Play some video games.”  


“Don’t you have homework?”  


“That homework is my bitch. I’m all about dominating equations and writing essays and shit. Don’t worry about it.”  


“Okay,” John smiled. “Sounds good.”  


Without warning Dave clutched a handful of John’s shirt, pulling him forward so he could kiss him.


End file.
